“Don’t blame anyone. Just fix it”.
–Susan Sarandon, Oscar winning actress
She was talking about the differences between good directors and bad directors.
Playing the “blame game” isn’t effective. It doesn’t work.
I googled blame. I asked who invented it. Wikipedia says “blame” resides in our head.
So, it’s a thought that occurs to us when we see a situation and we want to assign responsibility for why that situation exists.
When we want to say good things about a situation and assign responsibility to it, it’s called praise.
When we want to say critical things about a situation and assign responsibility, it’s called blame.
People blossom when praised. People wither when blamed.
Blamers are resented. Blamers are suffered. You can see and feel blame coming your way and you dread it.
The key to dealing with blame is for the blamed to recognize the urge to blame, grab it by the throat and strangle it.
The urge to blame is an opportunity to teach. The situation isn’t right, we want to fix it. What needs to be taught to fix it?
The urge to blame is an opportunity to understand. The situation isn’t right, we want to fix it. What do we need to learn to fix it?
The urge to blame is an opportunity to create. The situation isn’t right, we want to fix it. What ideas do we have to derive a better situation?
The urge to blame is an opportunity to team up. The situation isn’t right, we want to fix it. How can we work together to achieve a better result?
See good? Praise it. People flourish with praise.
Feel the urge to blame? Strangle it. Teach. Investigate. Create. Team Up.
People like fixing things. They like those that move them to a better place.
